Adventures in Comparison and Comfort: A Week of Fulbright, Bureaucracy, and Teaching

As I sit waiting for the delivery of a new mattress to my little flat in Paris, I have decided to embrace the moment to carry out my intention of weekly blogging.   This last week has been both incredibly frustrating and uplifting.   In this blog I am will talk about Fulbright, France (and American) bureaucracy, and my first forays into the French classroom.

Fulbright

On Monday and Tuesday of this week, I was privileged enough to find myself in a room filled with scholars from Harvard, Yale, Cornel, Berkeley and more. As always in these situations, I have to fight some small fly buzzing in the back of my mind, telling me that I am not good enough. I don’t have the Ivy League attached to my name. Nevertheless, beyond my forays into Oxford when students showed a decided loss of interest when I told them I didn’t go to Harvard or Yale, I have never been made to feel lessor by anyone from a top name school. In fact, in interacting with people from these incredible backgrounds, I often become more thankful for the education I have received because of the holistic approach to education that Mercer adopted.  Whereas many of the afore mentioned universities are incomparable in terms of their research capacities, Mercer taught me to be a citizen and to live out the Rotary International motto of “Service Above Self.” I truly believe that I would not be on my current life trajectory, one which involves a need to serve others, to be socially critical, and to transform thoughts into actions, if not for Mercer. I am not sure all universities envision the same outcome for their students, and I am proud to be a Mercer Bear.

            Having spent the last 2 years with Teach for America, I was struck by the seeming lassitude of Fulbright orientation. Instead of running at a constant, break-neck speed in pursuit of transforming students’ lives, Fulbright’s mission is more concerned with research and cross-cultural exchange and adopts a less charged agenda.  I have to say on some levels it is very reassuring that such beliefs exist and furthermore is furthered by millions of dollars/Euros/ Yen/Etc. every year. However, I miss the charge and excitement in the air that exists at a Teach For America meeting.  Regardless of how exhausting (physically, psychological, emotionally) TFA is, there was always a very real and focused sense of purpose. Here I see an un-unified sense of purpose, everyone sitting around the tables at the Fulbright orientation was intelligent and had an individual mission—to complete a dissertation, to further research into a dying language, or to research the brain patterns of coma patients. However, beyond our belief or interest in sharing culture, I do not see a great sense of unity in what we are doing… at least not on day 1.

            On day 2 of orientation things changed a great deal. Day 2 was concentrated solely on the role of the ETA or English Teaching Assistant. I have to say, as soon as we began I felt as if I had been submerged in the most cool and refreshing water.  To talk about pedagogy and to see people excited about the act of teaching was energizing and allowed me to find that focus and charge instilled in me by TFA.  I will say I feel a bit out of place in that I am the only one of the 5 ETAs who has significant teaching experience, particularly in “multicultural” classrooms. I’m a bit of the old maid, but only in terms of my experience and vision for my time here. I love my colleagues and find each of them to be brilliant and motivated in his or her own way.

            Having taught inclusion for the last 2 years, one thing that did shock me as shocked to find that largely EC or SPED doesn’t exist here. From what I was told and I need to confirm this with teachers at my school, but it seems that there is no Inclusion type model. Students are generally expected to conform to the existing model of education, a model that is notoriously inflexible and certainly on some levels exclusive of ethnically non-French populations.

            Beyond that small shock, I was exited to learn how the ETA program in France has transformed over the years. Speaking to a Professor from Mercer, who did the Fulbright/Tapif program years ago, he was placed in one of the highest performing schools in Paris, Henri IV. In fact, while hearing from the Dean of SciencesPo (a top graduate school in France) Henri IV was mentioned as one of the best and most challenging schools but that it was a direct line to the Grandes Ecoles (a type of college/university that is highly selective and requires two years of preparation post high school but pre-admission). I will include a graph of the French higher education system which roughly explains how Higher Ed works here in France:

To briefly explain what you see: The BAccalauréat or Bac is a sort of diploma one CAN received at the end of high school, if you pass the exam.  So students in high work for 3 years to prepare for their Bac, a one chance exam. If they pass then they can go to college to study for their Licence (Bachelors Equivalent).  If they do not pass however, they cannot enter college.  The Y-axis above shows how many years post-Bac it would take to earn a certain degree. So for instance, the Licence or Bachelors takes 3 years post-bac to obtain; a masters 2 more years; and then a Phd another 3 years. The Grandes Ecoles also can give a Masters but it is notably more prestigious. Generally students receive a Diplome (BIG DEAL) from the Grandes Ecoles.

            As for Fulbright, instead of placing Fulbrighters in the feeder patterns for students who are already privileged enough to be on a direct track to High Ed, ETAs in France are placed in schools marked as “Zones Prioritaires.” This means there is a high rate of drop out, low Bac pass rate, and the area is generally high poverty. What this also means is that my students are almost exclusively racial and religious minorities.  (–As a small aside, I am truly ASTONISHED at the fact that America and France reflect this same inequality… It poses question about the impact of certain structures on educational outcomes: Political and Social structures (democratic v. Social), linguistic structures such as the machismo-ism embedded in Romance languages, and historical precedents and racial ideologies that encouch educational systems, resulting in marginalization)  Anyways, I am excited to be working in this context and am very proud that Fulbright has shifted its mission to one that can immediately make a difference for students in need. BRAVO!

            In terms of my fellow ETAs and the people at the Franco-American Commission, which is charged with the organization of the Fulbright program, they are all wonderful, kind, and brilliant people. I am very thankful to have them in my corner and have received nothing but impeccable service with any request. Also, I would like to take a moment to say that though I am critical of many things, I do so not to tear down any organization, particularly any one that I have been fortunate enough to take part in. I simply pose questions and express things as I see them, hoping to keep my personal mission of fighting for educational equality always at the forefront of my mind.

French (and American) Bureaucracy

I will make this section short and sweet as I have experienced consistent waves of anger and frustration because of Bureaucracy, just ask my poor Mom who has had to hear my frustrations and complaints, even on her birthday. Sorry, Thanks, and I LOVE YOU. 

In my attempt to spell bureaucracy correctly, I realized for the first time that the French word “Bureau” or desk is the root of it, and now I understand why, as I haven’t left my desk since immigrating to this country.  My frustration does not come only from the shear quantity but from the way things are steeped in a tradition that on some levels is ridiculous. For example, in order to make an OFII appoint, which is required to validate one’s visa—I had to get a blue seal when I applied for my Visa, then had to make 4 copies of various documents, and finally sent to an office in Paris with an “accuse de reception; furthermore, one must pay for the visit, which consists of a medical exam in which you are X-rayed for TB, by purchasing ancient stamps… I’m sorry… WHAT? I have to pay you in stamps that can’t even be used as stamps… It is the only instance in France, which I have to do this however it is nonetheless ridiculous: how about taking credit card? 

Anyways, it is truly small things like this that just happen to drive me crazy because they always costing time and money to accomplish. Also, for being such a powerful country, France needs to embrace the technological…

Interlude: YAY! Just got my package aka a new Mattress J … and I have my Bank Cart PIN now; it finally came in the mail!

Okay, so ironically as I am complaining about bureaucracy, I finally after 3 weeks seem to have everything taken care of concerning my bank account. It was truly a saga. First I was turned away from the bank that is connect to BOA back home because I was told that the photocopy of my Hungarian landlady’s  passport was easily a counterfeit… Despondent, I went to another bank were a very kind man promptly helped me to open a bank account. I was turned away during that first appointment however because the same photocopy wasn’t large enough.  He then however fixed everything on our second appointment, and I thought everything was good to do. I wait nearly a week for my bankcard to come in the mail along with my Security code. I finally get a large envelope from Société Générale, my bank, I open it, feeling as if Christmas has finally arrivded; However, it was note, saying the American Government and more particularly the IRS required me to fill out a W-9 and another “Autocertification” so they could verify I didn’t avoid paying taxes… However! At long last, today I received my security code and a note saying my bank card is available whenever I want to come by and get it! Thank goodness, I am sincerely relieved. After 3 week, 5 bank trips, and 2 appointments, I can finally touch the money sitting in my bank account. This is an example of something that largely could have been handled online and therefore would have been expedited so I didn’t have to keep dipping into my ever-shrinking savings account.

  Anyways! Success at last (or at least I think so) and I am truly thankful J

The Classroom

My first impressions of “difficult” French schools is very mixed. First of all, in the three classes that I took part in, only one could be considered at all unruly, and pulling from my experiences as a CMA or New Teacher Coach for TFA over the summer, that unruliness comes from the expectations of the teacher. They were quite chatty, while I was attempting to talk with them, and whereas I realize some of them were needing translations of what I was saying to them (I spoke exclusively in English), talking when I am talking is NOT acceptable. Unfortunately the teacher’s method of classroom management is to politely shush them and say “guys.”  I one time took control and was the no-nonsense nurturer I was trained to be. They were quite. However, It couldn’tons reinforce my expectat via consequences, as it wasn’t my classroom, and I didn’t want to overstep my bounds. She told me after the class that the students need love… I smell an Unintended Enabler. I think she may be misconstruing strictness as a failure to loee.  However, I cannot exist in an environment where I cannot instruct students. I am here to make sure that these students get every opportunity and advantage on exams, in society, and life that can be afforded through mastery of another language. I will not allow their education to suffer because of a lack of behavior management.  With that being said, I am still hoping that this was simply a result of a day, which lacked structure.  She had forgotten that I was coming to the class and therefore I quickly introduced myself and then the students asked me questions and we spoke in English for the remainder of the class period (approximately 35 minutes).  However, I will say regardless of the small chatter—and it truly was small—in all three classes that I experienced, the students were not only gifted and brave—they were very willing to test out their very comprehensible English—but they were MUCH better behaved than any class I taught at Harding!  Granted this could be novelty but time will tell and I am very excited to be around students again. They are lovely and I have so much to learn from them.

            In one class we had a debate about who is the better singer Beyoncé or Rihanna… Most of the class chose Beyoncé, which is of course the right answer. J Also, I had the pleasure of being able to walk back to the metro with two of my students who are Muslim. (It was the middle of the day but French students are able to leave school for an hour for lunch).  I was struck because both of the young women were wearing their veil—In France, there is a law which prevents a Muslim woman from wearing a full burqua. I wasn’t surprised that they wore the veil; I was surprised because in class neither young woman had it on. I am now wondering if it is forbidden to wear a head covering in class, even if it for religious purposes. This is very surprising but could be a function of a society predicated on Judeo-Christian/Catholic beliefs. Even in the US, students have the right to wear the veil if they so choose.

 Anyways, These are my thoughts, musings, and explorations of the last week. Most importantly, I am starting to feel at ease here. My French skills are actually stronger after these last 3 weeks than there were when I left Angers. I went to a French movie with one of my best friends from Angers, Miao, and I was able to understand it perfectly well without subtitles (I don’t know if I could boast this in Angers).           –Another quick aside “Tu Veux ou Tu Veux Pas”  Horrible film! I would definitely not recommend it. Also, I was able to understand and communicate with someone on the phone today in order to get my mattress! YAY! It’s really difficult as you cannot see their lips or body expressions. The amount of context one receives for inferring meaning is severely limited by the phone. However, I was able to do it! So in gross, I feel good. I love Paris. And I long last I am finding friends here J